The Elbeit attack

I want to talk a bit about a terror attack that didn’t happen. Imagine if you will you’re going about an average wednesday night and all the spirits inside your brain that live in your brain in a world inside your brain are having a 9/11 moment. Like you’re trying to just ignore it but 95% of you is scared and crying, so you start crying too.

The Elbeit attack was a targeted supply chain attack, destroying infrastructure that ships goods from half my brain to the other – well, imaginary goods, bear with me – this trade system in my brain funds the resource gathering body (things like dopamine and serotonin I get from feeling fulfilled turns into things like lumber and ore). The supply chain to that was attacked by…

…You’ll probably guess this one if you follow my blog…

…The martians! Why would they do that? To cut supply from my peace area in my head to go more directly to martians. Now… usually when this shit happens there’s some thing going on in the real world that triggers it, but i’ll be real with you, gang, I have no idea why this is happening.

Out of everyone there has been peace negotiations with, and i’ve been deliberating with leaders in my head over this for hours, the martians have not given any demands. It’s just a bridge in my head, it can be fixed, like with magic if I wanted to, it’s my head. But the martians aren’t cooperating.

What does this mean? Why is my brain doing this to me? Why do my brain children have to go through their own 9/11 in my head? Why does any of this matter enough to make me cry? Why does this not make me cry when it happens in real life?

I don’t have answers. I hardly believe this is even being entertained by anybody in my head, but to the spirits that live in my head this is their real life, this is their real shocking moment, this is actually happening to them because they live inside my head so if my head wants to torment them they get tormented. That’s the real Hell. Hell exists inside your head, and the torment that your brain puts you through is the flames. My personal hell is living with this cursed world inside me with spirits inside me and no matter how much i tell myself it’s not real it happens to me, it’s half my experience in the conscious world. This shit will never stop no matter how much drugs you put me on, this war in my head is a life sentence.

What can I do about it? I personally want to scream this at doctors that this is happening to me until they drug me until i can’t feel my face. Just fucking do anything to make this shit in my head stop. I don’t care if I lose having thoughts, just make it. fucking… stop… please… Just make this shit stop…