Overly Trusting Trust Issues

The problem with both trusting and not trusting my instincts with Dissociative Identity Disorder is – well – my instincts change. Some days i’m such a bumbling idiot of a dissociative ego state that instincts are all I have; I have to trust my instincts. One personality that sticks out to me would be our first tulpa, which she’s not like… Incapable or anything, but logic is not on her side due to the nature of how and why she formed.

Now we have this “personality” you may call them, I prefer the term ego-state in the written formal language, we named him Pax, (or… he named himself… We let everyone choose a name when they first form if they don’t have one, pax’s real name is Keith.) Pax is a lot more logic oriented, and more so the person we’d go to for something like doing crosswords, or puzzle videogames, he’s also the least likely to break an electronics repair. But his instincts are very limited.

A weird hybrid I’d say is Hugo, who has both cunning puzzle solving skills as well as great instincts, which makes him great for abstract puzzles and cryptography (like the newspaper puzzles), but literally using the vocal cords he can’t speak properly. I will heavily sudder if I try to talk, and much like this one that’s almost entirely indicts, it’s better to just not talk.

I never answered the question, do I trust my instincts? I don’t even trust that time is linear, no.